I find myself at the end of the long road I have traveled in all my years of parent advocacy. I made this journey with so many others and learned from each one of them. Our common thread that held us all together was our passion for advocating. Lately this story has been coming into my mind. (See fact three below)
Fact 1. As each goose flaps its wings, it creates an “uplift” for the birds that follow. By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock has 71% greater flying range than if each bird flew alone.
Lesson. People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier, because they are traveling on the thrust of each other.
Fact 4. The geese flying in formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.
Lesson. We need to make sure our honking is encouraging. In groups where there is encouragement, the production is much greater. The power of encouragement (to stand by one’s heart or core values and to encourage the heart and core values of others) is the quality of honking we seek.
Fact 2. When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front of it.
Lesson. If we have as much sense as a goose, we stay in formation with those headed where we want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our help to others.
Fact 5. When a goose gets sick, wounded, or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help and protect it. They stay with it until it dies or is able to fly again. Then, they launch out with another formation to catch up with the flock.
Lesson. If we have as much sense as geese, we will stand by each other in difficult times as well as when we’re strong.
Fact 3. When the lead bird tires, it rotates back into the formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front of it.
Lesson. It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese, people are interdependent on each others’ skills, capabilities, and unique arrangement of gifts, talents, or resources.
I believed then I could make a difference and believe now that I have been the difference. However, there is no escaping time and as I look around me, I see the emergence of others stepping up just as it has always been in the parent movement, I can also sense my own mortality as I age. It is time for others to lead, I will always be involved in what I do but will prioritize the things I do and try to leave a sustainable footprint as I do go. So many people that touched my heart and taught me are gone. You are never truly gone if you remain remembered.
I know that I have taught many and watched their children become adults. I will continue to teach if I am capable, but it is time for students to become masters and teach those who come behind you. This is how it has always been and how it will always be. Parents teaching other parents I see those leaders stepping up and wish that God speeds in their mission. I am thinking of how I was in such awe of many that went before me and brought the right to access for all into federal law. How do I appear in the eyes of the young? An old, grizzled veteran perhaps? I have much to share and much to teach but the time for me to do it for others has [passed.
I have always been that one to deal with issues but recently I was approached by a mother wanting me to address the school board and when I declined, she commented that there was no advocate for children yet they are her children and her turn. She is getting there, and will no doubt be a leader of others Eventually we all come to the realization that it is our role as parents with children with disabilities to learn how to apply to our children and pass that knowledge on to those who come behind us,
Does it still matter to me ? Absolutely. a
IT MATTERS TO THIS ONE
As I walked along the seashore,
this young boy greeted me.
He was tossing stranded starfish
back to the deep blue sea.
I said, “Tell me why you bother,
why you waste your time this way.
There’s a million stranded starfish,
does it matter anyway?”
And he said, “It matters to this one.
It deserves a chance to grow.
It matters to this one,
I can’t save them all I know.
But it matters to this one,
I’ll return it to the sea.
It matters to this one,
and it matters to me.”
I walked into the classroom;
The teacher greeted me.
She was helping Johnny study,
he was struggling I could see.
I said, “Tell me why you bother,
why waste your time this way.
Johnny’s only one of millions,
does it matter anyway?’
And she said, “It matters to this one,
he deserves a chance to grow.
It matters to this one,
I can’t save them all I know.
But it matters to this one,
I’ll help him be what he can be.
It matters to this one,
and it matters to me.